To My Precious Daughter |
I love you.
How can I ever help you understand the depth of emotion behind those words? You are my firstborn, the culmination of a lifetime of hopes and dreams. And yet, the day of your birth, the day that should have been the happiest of my life, was my most tragic. Your twin brother, the second to emerge from my womb, was dead. Can you comprehend the overwhelming mix of emotions I’ve experienced since your birth; the intense joys of nurturing you and incredible pain of letting your brother go? I had such plans for the two of you! As an only child, I looked forward to witnessing the special relationship you would share. All the months of my pregnancy were spent eagerly anticipating the joyous confusion two babies could bring to our home. But with your brother’s death, all those happy plans were irrevocably torn away. I feel like a child whose father has betrayed her by snatching away a long-awaited gift just as she reaches out to accept it. How I wish I could make the occasion of your birth one of pure joy. But that is beyond my control. Your brother is as much a part of your life as he is of mine. I will try to take this terrible heartache and mold it into the special memories I so desperately want to share with you. And I will treasure you, my precious child, forever. I love you, Mama |